Monday, February 14, 2011

[Lifestyles] Happy Venereal Disease Day!

So today is another Valentine’s Day and I wanted take a moment to give a Valentine Day shout out to all the men out there who are spending the day, masturbating to busty Asian blonds, while others break their backs to impress the one they love. Yeah, as you can guess, I am not a fan of the day. Even when I was in a committed relationship, I made it known not to expect anything from me on this day because I always thought it was stupid to deplete my bank account and destroy my patience just for a pretty smile and 15 minutes of guaranteed sex. Doing special things for the one you love should come every day, sometimes even twice a day, but not on some manmade holiday that is just a gimmick for the greeting card monopoly.

I am going to leave those out there with some damaged pearls of wisdom. If you are going to indulge in your dollies tonight, remember VD also stands for Venereal Disease and it doesn’t take a holiday. Load up on the condoms, KY gel (Eros or Astroglide are much better) and tear the town or your friend for the night… apart. It is not going to be very special when you wake up with the hero ability to pee fire tomorrow morning. As for me, I am going to be relaxing in a nice hot bath watching the 3rd season of True Blood on my laptop while drinking a glass of Merlot and eating some chicken fingers.

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